I just felt sad today. I have noticed days when it is gloomy out... it is a lot worse. I was just thinking how Dan and I began trying to get pregnant almost one year ago now, and look where we are. In my mind, we are even farther from having a baby then we were a year ago. My body has been so out of whack. If you haven't gone through what I am going through, you may not understand what I am feeling. I am so afraid of my body not doing what it should be doing, because it did something so wrong when I was pregnant. How do I know that my body is doing what it needs to be doing in order to get pregnant? I don't know. It is out of my control and that kills me. I hate this. I had hoped to be pregnant on our due date... but the closer we get, the more discouraged I become and the more unlikely it will be.
Onto another subject, Dan and I went to The Happy Gnome on Friday to celebrate Nick's (Dan's dad) birthday. It was so good! Beer was good, food was good, company was good. However, it is things such as having a pregnant waitress-- like we did for dinner-- that I am constantly trying to battle my feelings with. I swear, everytime I am in public, it is something like that. Anyway... the food was so good. I highly recommend it if you have never been there. It is off Selby Ave in St. Paul. We then met up with a couple of my friends from work-- they came over to the Gnome. We had good conversation, and like a bunch of old people, were tired and headed home around 11:15. :o)
Well... here it is. Another week about to begin. Another Sunday night. I have had a rough weekend, and hope that this week is better. Hopefully I can get Dan to go golfing next weekend... or to the driving range. He actually mentioned doing that today- but I didn't want to waste a trip to the golf course on a day when it is cold and windy! No new episode of Castle tomorrow... so I will spend my evening with Kolby and Maia watching DWTS. Hope you all have a good week.
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