I had began updating my blog a while back, but much of what I want to update with is pretty personal. I may be making my blog private so I can use it as a journal as well. I don't mind of people read my posts, that is why I blog! So if the time comes and I make it private, don't be afraid to request to have access. If I am spilling out personal and strong feelings, I just may want to know who is reading it.
I didn't even look when the last time I posted was... but Brynn is 26 months (almost 2.5) and is just a firecracker. She is a little girl who knows what she wants, wants to dress like a princess, and wants her momma to do everything for her :) We are working on letting daddy help, and not always insisting on wanting "momma do it." Besides saying "momma's turn" all the time, her other favorite is "No, Brynnie do it" or "Brynnie's turn." She is very much into wanting to be independent and doing things herself. And you know what, most of the time she does a good job. She loves turning on the lights/ opening doors/ etc. by herself.
Brynn has also began gymnastics, and she loves it. If you are friends with me on facebook, or follow me on vine, you probably saw video :) She has become so much more confident in jumping and doing the activities in just the 3 weeks we have gone. It is so much fun watching her do it, and it really makes her look so big!
Brynn is talking up a storm. We pretty much communicate all the time. Sometimes I have to be her interpreter :) but for the most part she does well. Loves songs, and loves Daniel Tiger. I think he has officially surpassed Mickey. We have not watched Mickey in our house in a while! Singing is definitely a hobby of hers!
Brynnie also loves being outside! Now that the weather has been nice for a few days in a row, we have spent much of it outside. We are also really excited to find out if Brynn is going to have a baby boy cousin or baby girl cousin come September!
Wednesday, May 8, 2013
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
New Year's Resolution...
...is trying to do a much better job with my blog. I really want to have things going on with Brynn documented so I know what's normal when I go through this a second time... Whenever that may be!
Holy talking machine! Brynn is non stop, talking in sentences, and is pretty easy to communicate with. She tells me about her day, and she is just a doll. The last 3 days have been much better... With her being healthy finally! We just celebrated her 2nd birthday and unfortunately she was still not quite herself.
I'm on my iPad and hate typing on here but just wanted to post, but I'm gonna keep this short. Today marks 3 years since I delivered Elizabeth. 3 years. All day today I have had mixed emotions, and replayed many of the most vivid moments of that experience in my mind. I have had some great friends reach out to me today, and that meant more than they probably know. My awesome father-in-law brought us a bouquet of beautiful tulips that just light up the room. Dan and i do a couple of things in honor of Elizabeth ourselves, but I like to keep them private.
I just wanted to log on, and acknowledge my baby in heaven, since that was what began my blogging journey. My pregnancy with her. It also then continued to help with my process of healing, as well as documenting my journey with Brynn. Elizabeth, you are not forgotten. You are loved, will be continued to be loved, and Brynn will know that she has a sister in heaven.
For those of you who are close to me, or aren't, but have someone who has gone through a similar experience... Here is a great piece of advice.
"If you know someone who has lost a child and you are afraid to mention them because you think you might make them sad by reminding them that they died, they didn't forget that they died. You're not reminding them. What you're reminding them of is that you remember that they lived, which is a great gift." - Elizabeth Edwards
Beautiful Tulips from Nick
Here is Brynn loving her chocolate :)
Holy talking machine! Brynn is non stop, talking in sentences, and is pretty easy to communicate with. She tells me about her day, and she is just a doll. The last 3 days have been much better... With her being healthy finally! We just celebrated her 2nd birthday and unfortunately she was still not quite herself.
I'm on my iPad and hate typing on here but just wanted to post, but I'm gonna keep this short. Today marks 3 years since I delivered Elizabeth. 3 years. All day today I have had mixed emotions, and replayed many of the most vivid moments of that experience in my mind. I have had some great friends reach out to me today, and that meant more than they probably know. My awesome father-in-law brought us a bouquet of beautiful tulips that just light up the room. Dan and i do a couple of things in honor of Elizabeth ourselves, but I like to keep them private.
I just wanted to log on, and acknowledge my baby in heaven, since that was what began my blogging journey. My pregnancy with her. It also then continued to help with my process of healing, as well as documenting my journey with Brynn. Elizabeth, you are not forgotten. You are loved, will be continued to be loved, and Brynn will know that she has a sister in heaven.
For those of you who are close to me, or aren't, but have someone who has gone through a similar experience... Here is a great piece of advice.
"If you know someone who has lost a child and you are afraid to mention them because you think you might make them sad by reminding them that they died, they didn't forget that they died. You're not reminding them. What you're reminding them of is that you remember that they lived, which is a great gift." - Elizabeth Edwards
Beautiful Tulips from Nick
Here is Brynn loving her chocolate :)
Sunday, October 21, 2012
October
Brynn is talking up a storm. Anything I tell her to say, she repeats. She is asking "what's that?" To anything she doesn't know. Just today she pointed to my eye brow and asked me what it was. When I told her, she repeated it. She is so inquisitive and I know I'm biased, but she is so smart. She is great at her puzzles... And does them by herself, and also loves her shape sort things... Where you have to fit the heart through the heart hole... Circle in circle. There is an app on the iPad where she can do that, and she loves it.
Still... My favorite things she says are : lovey, ready, thank you, coloring ( it sounds like coloringing). She is super easy to communicate with now, too since she is so verbal. I almost always know what she wants/ needs. She is a bit of a drama queen :). But usually is pretty good when I tell her No. I feel like I've had to do less timeouts.
Lets see... She is really loving her baby lately. Bringing it all over. She crawled out of her pack n play at the cabin this weekend... Which I have a feeling will now be a struggle, and her crib isn't far behind. I think the key is making sure she is really tired when she goes down, otherwise she will get bored and figure it out :). This morning when I got her from bed she had taken her pj bottoms off, as well as her diaper. Luckily there was no mess.
I am leaving Brynn with Dan for the first time for the weekend... I'm going to be going out to WI for my roommate from colleges baby shower. I'm excited and nervous. I hope I'm not too anxious while I'm gone and enjoy my time for myself. I'm sure going to miss her. I hate leaving her during the day when I need to go to the store on the weekend... I'm sure it'll be fine. I am gonna try to get him at least to Skype with me...we will see.
Soccer has been over for a couple of weeks, so I am enjoying having more time with Brynn. The school year is just going great. I'm having a great year. Grad school is done... And now I can have fun doing crafty things, and hopefully start painting the house soon. I'm starting to lose my mind with the white walls and wall paper. Yuk.
Otherwise just enjoying the decent weather while I can!
Still... My favorite things she says are : lovey, ready, thank you, coloring ( it sounds like coloringing). She is super easy to communicate with now, too since she is so verbal. I almost always know what she wants/ needs. She is a bit of a drama queen :). But usually is pretty good when I tell her No. I feel like I've had to do less timeouts.
Lets see... She is really loving her baby lately. Bringing it all over. She crawled out of her pack n play at the cabin this weekend... Which I have a feeling will now be a struggle, and her crib isn't far behind. I think the key is making sure she is really tired when she goes down, otherwise she will get bored and figure it out :). This morning when I got her from bed she had taken her pj bottoms off, as well as her diaper. Luckily there was no mess.
I am leaving Brynn with Dan for the first time for the weekend... I'm going to be going out to WI for my roommate from colleges baby shower. I'm excited and nervous. I hope I'm not too anxious while I'm gone and enjoy my time for myself. I'm sure going to miss her. I hate leaving her during the day when I need to go to the store on the weekend... I'm sure it'll be fine. I am gonna try to get him at least to Skype with me...we will see.
Soccer has been over for a couple of weeks, so I am enjoying having more time with Brynn. The school year is just going great. I'm having a great year. Grad school is done... And now I can have fun doing crafty things, and hopefully start painting the house soon. I'm starting to lose my mind with the white walls and wall paper. Yuk.
Otherwise just enjoying the decent weather while I can!
Saturday, September 8, 2012
**Warning** Venting Blog Entry
Ok. I need to vent. I typically dont share political views via the internet... But There are 2 things that will be on the Minnesota Ballot this November, they are looked at as "party issues,". and in my opinion... They shouldn't be.
The first is voter ID amendment. Who in their right mind would be against this and what in the world would be a reason to be? There are SO many false facts out there. Truth is, ANYONE, legal to this country, a MN resident, and not a felon, will be able to get an ID if they don't have one already, at no cost. Therefore, the argument that people who are poor or elderly can't vote... Based on what facts? In the last election... I could have voted in THREE places: under my maiden name by my parents house, my mom said my name was still listed under hers. In Rosemount, which was where I voted, and in Inver Grove Heights, because Dan and I were living at his dads. What is wrong with this picture?? A LOT. This just frustrates the heck out of me.
Next, the marriage amendment. Why is this a party issue, too? Why are supposed "republicans" against this? It is completely against everything they stand for... Limited government and freedom. Anyone close to me knows I consider myself a conservative, vote typically (not always) republican. I am 100% against this amendment. Any person should have the freedom to marry who they want. It has no affect on my life at all. It just once again seems like common sense. Again, someone doesn't have to agree with the lifestyle... But who are you to tell someone they can't get married??
Why have both these issues come down to democrats vs. republicans?? If these two very important questions were being presented to the public in a fair and neutral manner, maybe people wouldn't look at them with jaded eyes, just because a certain party is affiliated with it.
In my opinion, and again, it is just my opinion, but in my opinion, the choice is just common sense for both these questions we will see on the ballot come November. Yes voter ID should be required, and No, marriage shouldn't be limited to just a man and a woman.
Ok. Vent over.
The first is voter ID amendment. Who in their right mind would be against this and what in the world would be a reason to be? There are SO many false facts out there. Truth is, ANYONE, legal to this country, a MN resident, and not a felon, will be able to get an ID if they don't have one already, at no cost. Therefore, the argument that people who are poor or elderly can't vote... Based on what facts? In the last election... I could have voted in THREE places: under my maiden name by my parents house, my mom said my name was still listed under hers. In Rosemount, which was where I voted, and in Inver Grove Heights, because Dan and I were living at his dads. What is wrong with this picture?? A LOT. This just frustrates the heck out of me.
Next, the marriage amendment. Why is this a party issue, too? Why are supposed "republicans" against this? It is completely against everything they stand for... Limited government and freedom. Anyone close to me knows I consider myself a conservative, vote typically (not always) republican. I am 100% against this amendment. Any person should have the freedom to marry who they want. It has no affect on my life at all. It just once again seems like common sense. Again, someone doesn't have to agree with the lifestyle... But who are you to tell someone they can't get married??
Why have both these issues come down to democrats vs. republicans?? If these two very important questions were being presented to the public in a fair and neutral manner, maybe people wouldn't look at them with jaded eyes, just because a certain party is affiliated with it.
In my opinion, and again, it is just my opinion, but in my opinion, the choice is just common sense for both these questions we will see on the ballot come November. Yes voter ID should be required, and No, marriage shouldn't be limited to just a man and a woman.
Ok. Vent over.
Monday, September 3, 2012
Pre-School Jitters
Tonight marks my 24th night before the first day of school. Can you believe that? 24 straight years of going to school... 7 of which have been teaching... The rest of me as a student. It's a different feeling as a teacher. But with 6 years under my belt, I still get anxious nervous. Good nervous... But still a little anxious. I am not so anxious about school and the kids. It is trying to keep up with house chores, dinner, and keeping up with my almost 20 month old! You see, if I am so tired I want a bowl of cereal for dinner, that is fine. But Brynn, I need to do better. That is the part where the anxiety comes in. Laundry, cleaning, etc. I know it will get better too when soccer is over.
On a side note... I got some awesome new nail polish I am digging. It is a mint color. I'm in love with it.
Ok, so Brynn has cut 2 teeth in the last week. Her other bottom molar, and then one of her pointy teeth. She's been kind of cranky and not eating well, but at least sleeping ok.
Capstone is printed and officially done. I plan and bringing it to Hamline this week and hopefully making my Sept. 15 deadline. Yay!
Hope all my teacher friends have a great first day tomorrow! :)
On a side note... I got some awesome new nail polish I am digging. It is a mint color. I'm in love with it.
Ok, so Brynn has cut 2 teeth in the last week. Her other bottom molar, and then one of her pointy teeth. She's been kind of cranky and not eating well, but at least sleeping ok.
Capstone is printed and officially done. I plan and bringing it to Hamline this week and hopefully making my Sept. 15 deadline. Yay!
Hope all my teacher friends have a great first day tomorrow! :)
Sunday, August 19, 2012
I Was Called Miss!
Ok... I don't know why this was so exciting to me, but yesterday while checking out at Rainbow the cashier called me miss! I feel like I get called ma'am all the time... and it makes me feel old. I then wonder if I look old enough to be a ma'am... and what constitues someone choosing to call me ma'am or miss? I know... way too much thought into it. However, it made my day hearing her call me miss :)
Summer has flown by I don't have much of a baby left anymore... she is such a little toddler. She has really started talking a lot. When she opens her mouth to say something, most of the time we know what she is saying or wants. It helps a lot with the communication piece. She knows a lot of her animal sounds, too... dogs, cats, ducks (which she loves), and monkeys. She has enjoyed playing with her big duplos, which has been nice. She still loves Mickey Mouse, but Elmo is a close second. When we see babies at the store, she will point to them and say baby. I would say that has been the most exciting thing over the last month. She is really beginning to make connections to things. She will see babies, airplanes, water on TV, and point to them and say the word.
So my last post about being clueless... fortunately that didn't last long and it was due to teething molars! Brynn's molar popped through and then crying at night stopped. She has been a lot better.
Soccer started last week... it has been going really well. I am more worried about the adjustment when I am back at work and coaching and Brynn will have such long days away from me. It really is only for September though so that will not be too bad.
Capstone is just about complete. I am just waiting on the final ok so I can type up my table of contents and print. I can't wait until it is all said and done. Then I wont feel guilty spending my time doing things around the house.
Speaking of house... we are still enjoying our home so much. We really like Cottage Grove and the convenience of everything. The dogs are getting more used to having a yard, and Brynn loves being able to run around outside, too.
Brynn is getting pretty good at dribbling the soccer ball. I got some video of it but it also got Maia and Kolby being obnoxious... so once I edit it I will have to post it. Otherwise... here are some pics from the last month.
Brynn at the beach on the St. Croix
Summer has flown by I don't have much of a baby left anymore... she is such a little toddler. She has really started talking a lot. When she opens her mouth to say something, most of the time we know what she is saying or wants. It helps a lot with the communication piece. She knows a lot of her animal sounds, too... dogs, cats, ducks (which she loves), and monkeys. She has enjoyed playing with her big duplos, which has been nice. She still loves Mickey Mouse, but Elmo is a close second. When we see babies at the store, she will point to them and say baby. I would say that has been the most exciting thing over the last month. She is really beginning to make connections to things. She will see babies, airplanes, water on TV, and point to them and say the word.
So my last post about being clueless... fortunately that didn't last long and it was due to teething molars! Brynn's molar popped through and then crying at night stopped. She has been a lot better.
Soccer started last week... it has been going really well. I am more worried about the adjustment when I am back at work and coaching and Brynn will have such long days away from me. It really is only for September though so that will not be too bad.
Capstone is just about complete. I am just waiting on the final ok so I can type up my table of contents and print. I can't wait until it is all said and done. Then I wont feel guilty spending my time doing things around the house.
Speaking of house... we are still enjoying our home so much. We really like Cottage Grove and the convenience of everything. The dogs are getting more used to having a yard, and Brynn loves being able to run around outside, too.
Brynn is getting pretty good at dribbling the soccer ball. I got some video of it but it also got Maia and Kolby being obnoxious... so once I edit it I will have to post it. Otherwise... here are some pics from the last month.
Brynn at the beach on the St. Croix
Saturday, July 7, 2012
Going From Confident to Clueless...
Well, what a week it has been. Temperatures reaching 100 degrees, feeling even hotter with humidity. It has been a long last 10 days. The AC has been running non stop, and it has been awfully difficult with a 17 month old that loves being outside. Finally, last night the heat broke, and it felt amazing not having that humidity today.
So, the title of my blog post is how I have felt over the last week or so. I transitioned Brynn from 2 naps a day to 1, and that went well. She has been going down every day about 12-12:30 and sleeping about 2 hours. Now, I don't know if it is coincidence... I am assuming so, but her bedtime has been an absolute disaster. Not only that, she has been so clingy. I can't do anything without her. if I set her down even to try and make her breakfast, she is huggung my legs whining "up, up." This is where I feel so helpless. Do I pick her up? It is so innocent but yet I am rewarding what she wants. Why does she want me to pick her up? Just for attention? Because her mouth hurts from teething? Hence where the clueless feeling comes in.... I just feel like all day long I have been battling her.
Bedtime now has become a battle. She has always been amazing at going to bed. A self soother. I could put her down right after reading her book, say nigh nigh, she would say it as I walked out. I would shut her door, and that would be that. Even though it has only been a few nights, it feels like that was an eternity ago. She clings to my neck when I try putting her in bed yelling "no! no! no!" I then try to rock her and she fights that for a while... and then finally cuddles into my chest. When she is finally calmed down, I lay her in her crib, and then she ususally whines and I rub her back a little bit until she is out. Then I have to sneak out of the room trying not to make the floor squeak, and hoping she stays asleep. I feel like I am walking on pins and needles with her, and I hate this feeling. I love her so so much, and just feel like I have no idea what I am doing, if something is wrong with her, or if what I am doing is making it worse. So, I feel as though I am going from a place where I felt so confident in my parenting, to feeling clueless again. I am hoping that is normal?? And that throughout raising her I will go through periods of time where things come easy and I feel confident, and then times will be tougher and I will feel clueless. I am just a person who likes being in control, and the fact that I feel as though I am not in control of this, makes it even harder. I am really struggling.
Brynnie has a nice scratch and bump on her forehead and a huge scratch on her knee... she loves to be outside and is a daredevil. I am hoping they heal by next Saturday, we are having pictures done by Kevin. Otherwise, I hope he can do some awesome photoshopping. I can't wait to have her pics taken, we haven't had any prof pics taken (besides candids at her birthday party) since she was 6 months old. I hope the weather is nice, and she is a little more herself.
We celebrated my Grandma's 90th birthday on June 30. It was a lot of fun. So many friends and family came to celebrate. It was so very hot, but it was so nice to see everyone.
We also have a completed fence now! It looks really nice, it turned out great. It has been such a treat to be able to let the dogs run around. You can tell they aren't used to it though... they definitely are dogs that like to be around me and dan. They really only like being out there if we go out with them. Here is a picture of the aftermath of Kolby playing fetch... Brynn wasn't too sure what to think.
We had a great 4th of July. We went over to Dan's Aunt and Uncle's on White Bear and had a lot of fun. With the heat and humidity, the lake water was so warm. We went swimming and even got to go on the jet ski. I even took Brynn for a little ride. We had good food, drinks, and of course good company. Dan's grandma and grandpa were in town from SD as well, so it was good to see them. On top of all that, Suter and Parise signed with the Wild! It still seems sureal to me. I am SO excited for this season. Now let's hope they both stay healthy...
Here is Brynn and Dan's cousin Berit :)
Here is Brynnie and Berit and Dan's cousin Sonja!
Brynn has her 18 month appt. on Wednesday, shots are not going to help with her attitude she has had lately. However, I am hoping the doc has some answers for me about what has been going on with her. Otherwise, this week not a whole lot else is going on. We just plan on enjoying the much nicer weather, and hopefully Brynn will be back to herself. My gut tells me it is teething... she has yet to get any molars or eye teeth, and she has been drooling and chomping on things a lot lately. She still only has her 8 teeth... but like I said, hope the doc has some answers. I will post after her appt with her stats :)
So, the title of my blog post is how I have felt over the last week or so. I transitioned Brynn from 2 naps a day to 1, and that went well. She has been going down every day about 12-12:30 and sleeping about 2 hours. Now, I don't know if it is coincidence... I am assuming so, but her bedtime has been an absolute disaster. Not only that, she has been so clingy. I can't do anything without her. if I set her down even to try and make her breakfast, she is huggung my legs whining "up, up." This is where I feel so helpless. Do I pick her up? It is so innocent but yet I am rewarding what she wants. Why does she want me to pick her up? Just for attention? Because her mouth hurts from teething? Hence where the clueless feeling comes in.... I just feel like all day long I have been battling her.
Bedtime now has become a battle. She has always been amazing at going to bed. A self soother. I could put her down right after reading her book, say nigh nigh, she would say it as I walked out. I would shut her door, and that would be that. Even though it has only been a few nights, it feels like that was an eternity ago. She clings to my neck when I try putting her in bed yelling "no! no! no!" I then try to rock her and she fights that for a while... and then finally cuddles into my chest. When she is finally calmed down, I lay her in her crib, and then she ususally whines and I rub her back a little bit until she is out. Then I have to sneak out of the room trying not to make the floor squeak, and hoping she stays asleep. I feel like I am walking on pins and needles with her, and I hate this feeling. I love her so so much, and just feel like I have no idea what I am doing, if something is wrong with her, or if what I am doing is making it worse. So, I feel as though I am going from a place where I felt so confident in my parenting, to feeling clueless again. I am hoping that is normal?? And that throughout raising her I will go through periods of time where things come easy and I feel confident, and then times will be tougher and I will feel clueless. I am just a person who likes being in control, and the fact that I feel as though I am not in control of this, makes it even harder. I am really struggling.
Brynnie has a nice scratch and bump on her forehead and a huge scratch on her knee... she loves to be outside and is a daredevil. I am hoping they heal by next Saturday, we are having pictures done by Kevin. Otherwise, I hope he can do some awesome photoshopping. I can't wait to have her pics taken, we haven't had any prof pics taken (besides candids at her birthday party) since she was 6 months old. I hope the weather is nice, and she is a little more herself.
We celebrated my Grandma's 90th birthday on June 30. It was a lot of fun. So many friends and family came to celebrate. It was so very hot, but it was so nice to see everyone.
We also have a completed fence now! It looks really nice, it turned out great. It has been such a treat to be able to let the dogs run around. You can tell they aren't used to it though... they definitely are dogs that like to be around me and dan. They really only like being out there if we go out with them. Here is a picture of the aftermath of Kolby playing fetch... Brynn wasn't too sure what to think.
We had a great 4th of July. We went over to Dan's Aunt and Uncle's on White Bear and had a lot of fun. With the heat and humidity, the lake water was so warm. We went swimming and even got to go on the jet ski. I even took Brynn for a little ride. We had good food, drinks, and of course good company. Dan's grandma and grandpa were in town from SD as well, so it was good to see them. On top of all that, Suter and Parise signed with the Wild! It still seems sureal to me. I am SO excited for this season. Now let's hope they both stay healthy...
Here is Brynn and Dan's cousin Berit :)
Here is Brynnie and Berit and Dan's cousin Sonja!
Brynn has her 18 month appt. on Wednesday, shots are not going to help with her attitude she has had lately. However, I am hoping the doc has some answers for me about what has been going on with her. Otherwise, this week not a whole lot else is going on. We just plan on enjoying the much nicer weather, and hopefully Brynn will be back to herself. My gut tells me it is teething... she has yet to get any molars or eye teeth, and she has been drooling and chomping on things a lot lately. She still only has her 8 teeth... but like I said, hope the doc has some answers. I will post after her appt with her stats :)
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