Going From Confident to Clueless...

Well, what a week it has been. Temperatures reaching 100 degrees, feeling even hotter with humidity. It has been a long last 10 days. The AC has been running non stop, and it has been awfully difficult with a 17 month old that loves being outside. Finally, last night the heat broke, and it felt amazing not having that humidity today.

So, the title of my blog post is how I have felt over the last week or so. I transitioned Brynn from 2 naps a day to 1, and that went well. She has been going down every day about 12-12:30 and sleeping about 2 hours. Now, I don't know if it is coincidence... I am assuming so, but her bedtime has been an absolute disaster. Not only that, she has been so clingy. I can't do anything without her. if I set her down even to try and make her breakfast, she is huggung my legs whining "up, up." This is where I feel so helpless. Do I pick her up? It is so innocent but yet I am rewarding what she wants. Why does she want me to pick her up? Just for attention? Because her mouth hurts from teething? Hence where the clueless feeling comes in.... I just feel like all day long I have been battling her.

Bedtime now has become a battle. She has always been amazing at going to bed. A self soother. I could put her down right after reading her book, say nigh nigh, she would say it as I walked out. I would shut her door, and that would be that. Even though it has only been a few nights, it feels like that was an eternity ago. She clings to my neck when I try putting her in bed yelling "no! no! no!" I then try to rock her and she fights that for a while... and then finally cuddles into my chest. When she is finally calmed down, I lay her in her crib, and then she ususally whines and I rub her back a little bit until she is out. Then I have to sneak out of the room trying not to make the floor squeak, and hoping she stays asleep. I feel like I am walking on pins and needles with her, and I hate this feeling. I love her so so much, and just feel like I have no idea what I am doing, if something is wrong with her, or if what I am doing is making it worse. So, I feel as though I am going from a place where I felt so confident in my parenting, to feeling clueless again. I am hoping that is normal?? And that throughout raising her I will go through periods of time where things come easy and I feel confident, and then times will be tougher and I will feel clueless. I am just a person who likes being in control, and the fact that I feel as though I am not in control of this, makes it even harder. I am really struggling.

Brynnie has a nice scratch and bump on her forehead and a huge scratch on her knee... she loves to be outside and is a daredevil. I am hoping they heal by next Saturday, we are having pictures done by Kevin. Otherwise, I hope he can do some awesome photoshopping. I can't wait to have her pics taken, we haven't had any prof pics taken (besides candids at her birthday party) since she was 6 months old. I hope the weather is nice, and she is a little more herself.

We celebrated my Grandma's 90th birthday on June 30. It was a lot of fun. So many friends and family came to celebrate. It was so very hot, but it was so nice to see everyone.

We also have a completed fence now! It looks really nice, it turned out great. It has been such a treat to be able to let the dogs run around. You can tell they aren't used to it though... they definitely are dogs that like to be around me and dan. They really only like being out there if we go out with them. Here is a picture of the aftermath of Kolby playing fetch... Brynn wasn't too sure what to think.

We had a great 4th of July. We went over to Dan's Aunt and Uncle's on White Bear and had a lot of fun. With the heat and humidity, the lake water was so warm. We went swimming and even got to go on the jet ski. I even took Brynn for a little ride. We had good food, drinks, and of course good company. Dan's grandma and grandpa were in town from SD as well, so it was good to see them. On top of all that, Suter and Parise signed with the Wild! It still seems sureal to me. I am SO excited for this season. Now let's hope they both stay healthy...

Here is Brynn and Dan's cousin Berit :)

Here is Brynnie and Berit and Dan's cousin Sonja!

Brynn has her 18 month appt. on Wednesday, shots are not going to help with her attitude she has had lately. However, I am hoping the doc has some answers for me about what has been going on with her. Otherwise, this week not a whole lot else is going on. We just plan on enjoying the much nicer weather, and hopefully Brynn will be back to herself. My gut tells me it is teething... she has yet to get any molars or eye teeth, and she has been drooling and chomping on things a lot lately. She still only has her 8 teeth... but like I said, hope the doc has some answers. I will post after her appt with her stats :)

Finally Some Sleep!

Well, as I mentioned in my last post, Brynn had her 9 month appointment last week. She is 29 inches long, 18.8 lbs. 90th % for length, and 50th% for weight. Still long and lean! At her appt we found out Brynn had an ear infection. I was relieved! I had brought her in a couple weeks before when she was sick, and nothing then. I am assuming her cold then led her to her ear infection. She was given amoxicillan, and she is acting like her normal happy self again!!

Sleep. Oh boy. Brynn got that nasty cold probably 3 weeks ago. It kept me home one day with her. Along with her cold, she was teething. Her top two are out and showing now! At the same time, she was developing her ear infection. No wonder she was not sleeping well!! It has been a long month of nights... but the last 2 nights have been awesome!! Last night, she went down about 7:30 without screaming, and didn't wake up until 4 am. I fed her, hoping she would let me sleep in since I didn't have to get up this morning. She did! Woke up at 7 am!! Yay! I hope this trend continues... because she is so much more cheery and like herself! :o)

We had conferences this week. So uneventful. Which is good! My kids this year are so so so awesome, so that is why I think they were so easy. Not a lot of issues to talk about! I am really enjoying these kids. I know I am going to be sad seeing a lot of them move on at the end of the year...

Faith (SSP Varsity Soccer team) plays to go to state tonight. For once, it isn't against Mahtomedi! They have a very good chance at making it to state. I am so happy for the girls (and a little jealous). I really hope they win, and that I am able to make it to the game if they do. The year we had the best chance of making it to state in HS, we played Minnehaha Academy in the Section Finals, and lost 2-0. They went on to win the state tournament. I still remember that game. I remember the field, what the weather was like, everything. Crazy how those things stick with you. I was fortunate at least to win a conference tournament in college, and make it to the National Tournament. Oh the glory days! I sure miss playing soccer at that competitive of a level. I think I will finally be healthy enough to play this summer. Having 2 summers off due to being pregnant/ dealing with post pregnancy issues was a bummer.

We have a guy from Renters Warehouse coming over tomorrow to look at our townhome to see how much we can rent it out for. I know we will probably take a bit of a hit and have to pay a couple hundred a month, but it is what it is. This whole situation though is so depressing. I just wish we could sell our house and buy another one-- like normal people did it 5 years ago. That was our plan. At no fault of our own, we are now in a stupid situation... I hate that we have to live with someone else for a bit of time (most likely) if we want to buy a house. If we didn't, we would be here a lot longer. We have some decisions that need to be made and made fast. If we are renting, they recommend being out by November 1st. That is just around the corner. Ugh. Stress and decisions. I hate decisions.

Today I am going to a market research interview-- I make $100!! Money for shopping :) it is only an hour and it is about diapers. What a good deal! I also have my 2nd chiropractor appt in one week... I am having issues with my shoulder/ neck. It isn't good and I am in a lot of pain. I hope I can get it taken care of.

As far as the rest of the weekend, tomorrow I should clean... maybe squeeze in some shopping :) We have the meeting with the renters warehouse guy. We also should start packing/ organizing if we go that route. Saturday I think I am watching Brynnie's friends, Liam and Sophie. My Friends Kelsey and Kevin (who watch Brynn) are taking some pictures of my other friend Amy's daughter... so I offered to watch the kiddos for them-- the least I can do for them watching my Brynnie everyday... which I know I say all the time, but it is going wonderfully!!! She just loves Kevin... and they all seem to be enjoying her! :)

I think that is all I have for now... here is a video of Miss Brynn from yesterday.

9 Months... Busy, Busy, Busy!

The only reason I am up still is because I am watching Castle. Otherwise, I would typically be in bed. Life has been so busy! Work is going well... Wild season has started... And I am busy chasing Brynn around! She is quite the mover. I am sure it is just a matter of time before she is standing/ walking on her own. She walks all along the couch/ coffee table. It is so fun. She is also starting to copy things we do, and Clapping my hands when put them out. She just is so curious and learning so much. She loves Cheerios Her sleeping has been up and down... Last couple of nights have been good! Hopefully we are turning a corner.

Brynn now has 4 teeth! This is another thing that I think is affecting her sleep. Now that her top two are through and visible... I think that has helped. Hopefully the most painful part is done.

We have her 9 month Appt on Thursday, so I will have to be sure and post her stats after it.

We went to the Wild home opener on Saturday. What a fun game! They look so great. I am excited for what is to come this season.

Other than that not much is new. Looking forward to the cooler weather again. This heat has been crazy. Us Minnesotans are never happy with the weather... Also am planning a trip to the apple orchard this weekend! Forecast looks great :)